Ferd and Jorge Measly's Apartment

''"Barry found himself in the dirtiest apartment that the inviolate dicta of Time and Space would allow." - ''Barry's first impression of the apartment.

Ferd and Jorge both own a revolting at the Oneida in New York. The Oneida housed a lot of old timey actors such as James Dean and Carmen Miranda. John Wilkes Booth also stayed there for a time. The building's haunted by a really annoying improve actor named Tony who was said to have died on stage. Now he's forced to do improv for all eternity. He pops up at random times and begins to act out a sceen, and if you don't go through the whole thing with him he'll cause little anoyances in your life: showers going cold, keys sticking in locks that sort of thing. The aparment itself reaks with the stench of one of Ferd's Chinese-food-turned-science-experiments wafting from the fridge. The walls are a pepto bismo pink painted by the previous residents. The foul carpet is covered with crumbs, bitten fingernails, and dry boggers. So much so that it was impossible to tell where the mess ended and the carpet begain. For some reason there happens to be a singing bathtub in their kitchen. Ferd and Jorge don't pay the phone bill and so enchant their phone when they wish to call someone. Aside from the illegal calls they also get illegal cable. As a whole Ferd and Jorge's apartment is a completely disgusting place to live - or do anything else for a matter of fact. Ferd and Jorge gave up their apartment once J.G. gave them a fat stack of cash and their place was attacked by Falsies.